Dealing with anxiety…

Hi Lovelies…

Today I thought I would touch on a very delicate subject, but one that affects a lot of people, a lot more than we tend to think sadly. Now I know that this is a very personal subject, maybe too personal for this blog, however I really do feel that it is important to talk about anxiety, as maybe it might help just one person out there – which is good enough for me…

I have always been a bit anxious, especially with small things like ordering my own food, walking into a place I don’t know, or meeting new people. Those things I guess are what a lot of people may struggle with, but don’t over think it.

However to me, those things slowly caused problems. I was very, very shy and found it extremely hard to speak to people who I didn’t know very well, which I’m sure made me look very ignorant, which then led to me becoming more anxious as a result. It was pretty much like a circle and I couldn’t really find my way off it and head in a straight line of clarity.

The worst point of dealing with anxiety was when I was laid off from a job with no warning, 2 years ago. This then meant that I had a lot of time to think..and thinking became my worst enemy.

If I’m honest, I don’t like talking about how I felt at that point and I’m not going to go into detail because that is too personal. However, the main culprits were over thinking and the fact I had put on weight from the contraceptive injection (I will do a separate post on this if people are interested about my experiences with it?). I began to slowly but surely get myself into a rut and suffered with a serious case of self loathing.

My daily routine basically consisted of negative and quite frankly depressing thoughts running around my head…round and round and never-ending. I basically, felt that I was such an unlike-able person that even my friends didn’t like me and that is a horrible and very lonely place to be.

It got to a point where I couldn’t take it anymore and even though it took a lot of courage, I finally went to a doctor about it. My mum and my Dad had both previously suffered with depression, so I started to think that is what I had. I knew though, that whatever happened, I wasn’t going to take any medication, as to me that was a dangerous route to go on that I might never have got off.

I chose counselling and it helped me dramatically and made me see things from a different point of view. It made me realise that it wasn’t my fault for feeling that way at all and it was if anything, normal for it to happen, given the circumstances.

I cannot stress enough to you how important it is to talk about how you are feeling. Don’t be afraid to go to a counselor and talk about it all. Don’t be afraid to tell your family or friends, because they are there to help you and please realise that you are not alone. I know that I felt like a freak sometimes for feeling the way I did and that I wasn’t normal, but the sad thing is that lately it is becoming more and more normal to suffer with anxiety or depression.

I was told that I was a “jumping to conclusions” thinker – which basically meant that I would think “she hates me” if she didn’t reply to a text, or “why hasn’t he called, he doesn’t love me anymore”. If you find that you think like this…please realise that it is YOU making that up in your head and it ISN’T real no matter how much you think it.

In fact, when you feel like that, write it down and then write down a rational explanation for why they haven’t replied or whatever the situation is. You will soon start to realise that you are “jumping to conclusions” and it will help you to see things more clearly. Just remember, that when you do start to worry or feel anxious, tell yourself you are jumping to conclusions and if there is no solid proof of what you worry about, then it probably isn’t true at all!

Something else that helped me, so much so that I don’t struggle with it half as much anymore, was to stop ignoring it and trying to fight it away. If you fight your worried thoughts and anxieties, you end up storing them away in your brain and this then means they can come back out to play havoc! If you give yourself time to observe what is worrying you, you can then think about it from an outside perspective. Try and think how you would help someone who was dealing with it and what would you say? This usually helped to calm my worries and make me feel more at ease.

Make sure that you make it a priority to get enough sleep, because feeling tired just increases the anxiety you feel. When I sorted my sleeping pattern out, I felt a million times better.

Always make sure to think positive too and this is one of the most important points I have to make, just tell yourself positive things and think about things with a more positive outlook and your brain will slowly start to learn to think that way naturally and banish those persistent and horrible worries for good!

I feel a lot more happier now and that is due to me taking control and doing something about it. Being more active and social helps a lot, so don’t lock yourself away even though that’s all you want to do, please go out and enjoy yourself, think happy and realise that you are not alone in your thoughts! Even just going out for a walk, or to an exercise class can help dramatically. Just be happy..even though it seems like a million miles away, you will get there, as long as you grab it by the horns and kick its butt!

I hope this helps you and I’m so sorry for such a long post. I didn’t want it to be too personal to me, I just want to bring anxiety to peoples attention and hopefully help.

Thanks.

x

Dealing with anxiety

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15 thoughts on “Dealing with anxiety…

  1. Very courageous post! It’s always good to know you’re not alone with these kind of problems, and hearing about other people’s experiences is so encouraging. I have OCD and anxiety issues, and its great to hear someone write about how positive they feel after overcoming these problems. Inspiring!

    • Glad it helped a little! I just read through your blog and the post about your health. You are amazing for getting through it all and you seem very positive from your other posts. Anxiety is horrible to deal with alone never mind with illnesses too. I hope you health gets much better for you and the anxiety banishes! xx

  2. glad i’m not the only one…my anxiety leads on to horrendous night terrors that I can not even begin to explain…nice to see your doctors help, mine try to shortcut their way out of it with medication or sleeping pills…not the answer! thanks for the post i may pay them yet another visit (they just think i am a hypochondriac now though ha!)
    saff
    x

    • Oh no! 😦 It’s horrible isn’t it!
      It’s amazing how many people do suffer with it that you didn’t ever know and I guess it’s kind of comforting in a way to know it’s not just you!
      It’s so bad they are like that with you, to be honest the doctor didn’t really care but the person he referred me to was amazingly good luckily!
      xx

  3. You know there are ways you can get over or at least reduce your anxiety. I personally had really bad anxiety but this changed only when I decided to change my lifestyle. I started exercising daily & eating healthy, I also started taking kick boxing classes as it helps me release and get my mind off of things – in my opinion over thinking is what worsens anxiety. This video also helped me overcome my anxiety – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ncg7QdloTHA.

    Btw you are so cute, you look like Kylie – a friend of mine.

    • Yeah, I did mention in this post to be active and social as that was the main thing that helped me definitely. Getting out and walking a lot was a big help :). I don’t mean to over-think as I agree with you that it doesn’t get you anywhere, I just found that taking the time to observe and think rationally helped, rather than suppressing the thoughts away. I will check that video out when back from home, thanks :). And aww thanks! 🙂 x

    • Oops! Sorry haven’t replied to your comment sooner! Thank you 🙂 Yes, be good to speak to somebody else with similar problems! Hope you are well, you will have to come and see how Millie is doing soon, she’s the most affectionate cat I have ever seen haha xx

      • Oh she gets that from her mother! She was such a softy…so much so that even the old lady who looks after her now says she is needy! Certainly is a plan, we should have a make up party as we blatantly never get to play enough with make up! Fab news, shes a great girl bex, I will make sure to introduce you! I’m all for doing good work in the world:) Not to worry I am forever finding comments I missed. Well done on the blog doing so well, it’s great, so chuffed for you Xx

      • Haha! Aww, it’s lovely but sometimes all you have to do is look at her and she’s meowing for attention. Yes! That’s a good idea, we need to do it..in fact we MUST do it haha and a bit of a blog collaboration? And thank you, that would be lovely if you could. Ahhh thanks lovely, it’s mental! 🙂 xxx

      • Tis a date, we shall discussed via facebookage 🙂 yey rather excited now! I have my old professional kit which I am happy to bring down…I wanna do my theatre make up! teehehe. Bless millie ❤ can't wait to see her Xx

  4. The problems you’ve had sound very similar to my own, I never realised how many people suffered with the same kind of anxiety until I started reading blogs. I think this is a great post to show people that it can be overcome but I’m finding it so hard atm as I’ve moved away from all my friends and family and my bf really doesn’t understand at all, he just tells me to grow up lol. Maybe counselling would help but the thought of that scares me too! xx

    • Hi Gina! There’s a bit of comfort with knowing that others feel the same as you isn’t there. That’s sad that you have moved away from your friends, can you still skype and ring them to keep in contact? It’s not nice of him to say “grow up” because that makes you feel more anxious. But honestly, counselling isn’t for everything, which I understand and it is daunting, but it helped me a lot! And I haven’t felt anxiety as bad as I did before I went. xxx

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